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The Cowboy.

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: September/25/2008 at 11:48
cyborg View Drop Down
Optics God
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God of Wind

Joined: August/24/2007
Location: North Georgia
Status: Offline
Points: 12082
A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in California when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him. 
 
The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and asks the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?"  
   
 
Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?" 
 

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer,connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. 
 

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in  Hamburg , Germany   

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response 
 

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and says, "You have 
Exactly 1,586 cows and calves" 
 

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.
 

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.  
 

Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?" 
 

The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?" 

"You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government",
Says Bud.  

"Wow! That's correct, " says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"  
"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew,to a question I never asked. You tried to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about
Cows...this is a
Herd of sheep...



Now give me back my dog.



Edited by cyborg - September/25/2008 at 11:52
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: September/25/2008 at 11:51
rockblaster View Drop Down
Optics GrassHopper
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Joined: March/14/2008
Location: Auberry, Ca
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Great!
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: September/25/2008 at 12:43
silver View Drop Down
Optics Master
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BAAAAd
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: September/25/2008 at 15:21
swtucker View Drop Down
Optics Master
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thats funny
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: September/25/2008 at 16:38
Steelbenz View Drop Down
Optics Master Extraordinaire
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ROLL TIDE ROLL

Joined: January/03/2006
Location: Heart of Dixie
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Points: 4917
Someones been to Montgomery!!!!!     LOL 
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: September/26/2008 at 07:23
martin3175 View Drop Down
Optics Master Extraordinaire
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Joined: January/19/2005
Location: Maryland
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Points: 3773
Laugh
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