Subject

All arrivals in heaven have to go through a bureaucratic examination
to determine whether admission will be granted. One room has a clerk
who inputs computerized records of what each applicant did on his or her last day of life.

The first applicant of the day explains that his last day was not a
good one. "I came home early and found my wife lying naked in bed. She claimed she had just gotten out of the shower. Well, her hair was dry and I checked the shower and it was completely dry too. I knew she was into some hanky-panky and I began to look for her lover. I went onto the balcony of our 9th floor apartment and found the SOB clinging to the rail by his finger tips. I was so angry that I began bashing his fingers with a flower pot. He let go and fell, but his fall was
broken by some awnings and bushes. On seeing he was still alive I
found super human strength to drag our antique cedar chest to the
balcony and throw it over. It hit the man and killed him. At this
point the stress got to me and I suffered a massive heart attack and
died." 

The clerk thanked him and sent him on to the next office.

The second applicant said that his last day was his worst. "I was on the roof of an apartment building working on the AC equipment. I stumbled over my tools and toppled off the building. I managed to grab onto the balcony rail of a 9th floor apartment but some idiot came rushing out on the balcony and bashed my hands with a flower pot. I fell but hit some awnings and bushes and survived, but as I looked up I saw a huge chest falling toward me. I tried to crawl out of the way but failed and was hit and killed by the chest." 

The clerk couldn't help but chuckle as he directs the man to the next room.

He is still giggling when his third customer of the day enters. He
apologizes and says "I doubt that your last day was as interesting as
the fellow in here just before you."

"I don't know" replies the man, "picture this, I'm buck naked hiding'
in this cedar chest....."

Similar Threads: "New Arrivals"
Subject	Author	Forum	Replies	Last Post
New member new scope questions	P&Y	Rifle Scopes	9
Happy New Year Fellas, Whats New	Obi Wan Kenobi	Rifle Scopes	4
New Binos. new member	encore4me	Binoculars	8
New rifle needs a new scope	ITyson	Rifle Scopes	7
New Gun needs New Scope - Your thoughts??	snuff	Varmint Scopes	15
Have New Stock - Now need new scope	DCAMM94	Rifle Scopes	25
New rifle (again), need new scope (again)	bugsNbows	Rifle Scopes	10
Please help new scope for new gun	Mach88	Rifle Scopes	3
new handgun	bugsNbows	Firearms	5
For Sale New gen 1 Razor 16-48x65 spotter	billiam13	Optics For Sale	0

helo18 Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Optics Jedi Knight Joined: December/02/2006 Location: Montana Status: Offline Points: 5511	That is great!!
	To be prepared for War is one of the most effectual means of preserving peace. GEORGE WASHINGTON

bugsNbows Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Optics Jedi Master bowsNbugs Joined: March/10/2008 Location: Florida Status: Offline Points: 9502	LOL
	If we're not suppose to eat animals...how come they're made of meat? Anomymous

jonoMT Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Optics Master Extraordinaire Joined: November/13/2008 Location: Montana Status: Offline Points: 4741	+1
	Reaction time is a factor...

Kickboxer Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List MODERATOR Moderator Joined: February/13/2008 Status: Offline Points: 18898	http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pe-Eosmk6oE
	Opinion,untempered by fact,is ignorance. There are some who do not fear death... for they are more afraid of not really living

SVT_Tactical Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List Optics Retard Chief Sackscratch Joined: December/17/2009 Location: NorthCackalacky Status: Offline Points: 29041

New Arrivals