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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/20/2008 at 11:29
cyborg View Drop Down
Optics God
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God of Wind

Joined: August/24/2007
Location: North Georgia
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Hollywood Squares:
> > >
> > > If you remember the Original Hollywood Squares and its comics, this
> > > may bring a tear to your eyes. These great questions and answers are
> > > from the days when " Hollywood Sq uares" game show responses were
> > > spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now. Peter Marshall was the
> > > host asking the questions, of course..
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. Do female frogs croak?
> > > A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.
> > >
> > >
> > ; > Q.If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should
you
> > > be?
> > > A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.
> &g t; >
> > >
> > > Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
> > > A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q.You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or
a
> > > woman?
> > > A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and
> > > you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if
> > > he's married?
> > > A. Rose Marie: No; wait until morning.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q.Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
> > > A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say "I Love
You"?
> > > A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. What are "Do It," "I Can Help," and "I Can't Get Enough"?
> > > A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next
apartment.
> > >
> > > < BR>> > > Q.As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your
> > > hands while talking?
> > > A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and
> > > I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.
> > >
> > > Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
> > > A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q.Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to
> > > get any during the first year?
> > > A. Charley Weaver: Of course not , I'm too busy growing strawberries.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
> > > A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist
> > > camps. On e is politics, what is the other?
> > > A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
> > > A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
> > > A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a
goose
> > > do?
> > > A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?
> > >
> > >
> > > Q.If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
> &g t; > A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the
dark.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong wit h get ting
into
> > > the habit of kissing a lot of people?
> > > A.. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
> > > A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q.Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his
> > > head, what was he trying to do?
> > > A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your
> > > elephant?
> > > A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?
> > >
> > >
> > > Q.When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for it s sex?
> > > A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he fi rmly believes in them
> > > and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
> > > A. Charley Weaver: His feet.
> > >
> > >
> > > Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do
in
> > > bed?
> > > A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/20/2008 at 12:06
Dogger View Drop Down
Optics Jedi Knight
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Great stuff! Sure miss some of those guys,
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/20/2008 at 12:30
tahqua View Drop Down
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Have You Driven A Ford Lately?

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Makes me long for something different than what I get out of T.V. these days.
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/20/2008 at 13:47
silver View Drop Down
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Originally posted by tahqua tahqua wrote:

Makes me long for something different than what I get out of T.V. these days.
 
Keep that up and we will vote you off the island...
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/20/2008 at 14:22
cyborg View Drop Down
Optics God
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God of Wind

Joined: August/24/2007
Location: North Georgia
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Points: 12082
survivor, talk about some twisted stuff...................I prefer HOUSE, and I miss 24 too
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/20/2008 at 15:18
tahqua View Drop Down
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Have You Driven A Ford Lately?

Joined: March/27/2006
Location: Michigan, USA
Status: Offline
Points: 8043
Originally posted by silver silver wrote:

Originally posted by tahqua tahqua wrote:

Makes me long for something different than what I get out of T.V. these days.
 
Keep that up and we will vote you off the island...
 
Excellent That's funny
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/20/2008 at 22:26
RONK View Drop Down
Optics Master Extraordinaire
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Joined: April/05/2007
Location: United States
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Points: 3199

 

 Great post, Cyborg!

I haven't laughed this hard in a long time! Those were some very witty people!

 Paul Lynde was insane. I recall one of the rare times I happened to watch the show.  Paul was asked, "when setting up an aquarium for tropical fish, it is very important to make sure they have a place to what?"

 Without a second's hesitation, he replied" A place to worship! "
  That struck me funny, and I remember it all these years later.
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