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3_tens
Optics Jedi Master Joined: January/08/2007 Location: Oklahoma Status: Offline Points: 7853 |
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Posted: September/06/2011 at 21:07 |
After being married for 40
years, I took a careful look at my wife one day and said, "Forty years ago we
had a cheap house, a junk car, slept on a sofa bed and watched a 10-inch black
and white TV, but I got to sleep every night with a hot 23-year-old
girl.
Now ... I have a $500,000.00 home, a $35,000.00 car, a nice big bed and a large screen TV, but I'm sleeping with a 63-year-old woman. It seems to me that you're not holding up your side of things." My wife is a very reasonable woman. She told me to go out and find a hot 23-year-old girl and she would make sure that I would once again be living in a cheap house, driving a junk car, sleeping on a sofa bed and watching a 10-inch black and white TV. Aren't older women great? They really know how to solve an old guy's problems. |
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Folks ain't got a sense of humor no more. They don't laugh they just get sore.
Need to follow the rules. Just hard to determine which set of rules to follow Now the rules have changed again. |
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300S&W
Optics God Joined: January/27/2008 Location: Burlington,WV Status: Offline Points: 10592 |
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"I ain't got time to bleed!"
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billyburl2
Optics Master Extraordinaire Joined: January/08/2009 Location: Cottonwood, AZ Status: Offline Points: 4015 |
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If it is tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
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scooter65
Optics Master Extraordinaire Joined: December/29/2006 Location: mi Status: Offline Points: 3567 |
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bugsNbows
Optics God bowsNbugs Joined: March/10/2008 Location: North Georgia Status: Offline Points: 11200 |
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Indeed they do.
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If we're not suppose to eat animals...how come they're made of meat?
Anomymous |
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Urimaginaryfrnd
MODERATOR Resident Redneck Joined: June/20/2005 Location: Iowa Status: Offline Points: 14964 |
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"Always do the right thing, just because it is the right thing to do". Bobby Paul Doherty Texas Ranger |
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budperm
Optics Retard show me your sheep!! Joined: January/01/2009 Location: Pennsylvania Status: Offline Points: 31710 |
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I'm just as amazed that he was able to acquire all that and keep her happy for 40 years much less just be solvent!
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"Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading".
--Thomas Jefferson |
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BeltFed
Optics Retard Joined: February/12/2008 Location: Ky Status: Offline Points: 22284 |
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One day I woke up, looked around at all the stuff I had and thought about what it took to get it all. Then I thought about the wife and how she had changed with time. Then I thought about what would happen if we got divorced; I'd loose more than half my stuff and make half as much money. Then I thought about how old I was and realized "I'm to old to start over". Easiest way to avoid a mid-life crises I know of.
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Life's concerns should be about the 120lb pack your trying to get to the top of the mountain, and not the rock in your boot.
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budperm
Optics Retard show me your sheep!! Joined: January/01/2009 Location: Pennsylvania Status: Offline Points: 31710 |
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That sure sounds like rolling over to me....
Is 'she who must be obeyed' back from Alaska and the Ice Road truckers Convention she went to with Large Marge? You seem to be enjoying your weekends lately so I'm thinking ...Not!
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"Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading".
--Thomas Jefferson |
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BeltFed
Optics Retard Joined: February/12/2008 Location: Ky Status: Offline Points: 22284 |
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Yep she's home. Got that oil derrick delivered and wrestled a Grizzly at an exhibition match in Juno. Of course the bear lost, and the trainer can't get him to come out of his cage now. She wants to go back but she said she's not going to wrestle anymore eskimos. She says their to hairy and have really bad breath.
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Life's concerns should be about the 120lb pack your trying to get to the top of the mountain, and not the rock in your boot.
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SVT_Tactical
MODERATOR Chief Sackscratch Joined: December/17/2009 Location: NorthCackalacky Status: Offline Points: 31233 |
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Dang, thats the 4th grizzly she has ruined
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budperm
Optics Retard show me your sheep!! Joined: January/01/2009 Location: Pennsylvania Status: Offline Points: 31710 |
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4th grizzly.... lost count on the Eskimos....!
I bet if we ever get to meet her she is 4 foot nothing and 75lbs soaking wet and the sweetest person in the world.... opposites attract ya know!
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"Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading".
--Thomas Jefferson |
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budperm
Optics Retard show me your sheep!! Joined: January/01/2009 Location: Pennsylvania Status: Offline Points: 31710 |
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Dang thats the 4th or 5th time she's oiled Derrick! I hear he is actually looking forward to her next visit!
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"Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading".
--Thomas Jefferson |
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BeltFed
Optics Retard Joined: February/12/2008 Location: Ky Status: Offline Points: 22284 |
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Careful guys, the wife does have the password here. She beat it out of me. If you see a black and pink Kenworth pull in front of your place you better know where the back door is.
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Life's concerns should be about the 120lb pack your trying to get to the top of the mountain, and not the rock in your boot.
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stickbow46
Optics Master Extraordinaire Joined: January/07/2009 Location: Benton, Pa Status: Offline Points: 4678 |
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Pearls of Wisdom are Heard not Spoken
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budperm
Optics Retard show me your sheep!! Joined: January/01/2009 Location: Pennsylvania Status: Offline Points: 31710 |
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Late to the party again Ernie!
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"Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading".
--Thomas Jefferson |
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trigger29
Optics Master Extraordinaire X = 180 Y = 90 (X+Pyro)+(Y-Pyro) = ? Joined: September/29/2007 Location: South Dakota Status: Offline Points: 4353 |
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"A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed." |
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budperm
Optics Retard show me your sheep!! Joined: January/01/2009 Location: Pennsylvania Status: Offline Points: 31710 |
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Yeah I know...and BD or Ted aren't even involved!!!!
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"Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading".
--Thomas Jefferson |
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stickbow46
Optics Master Extraordinaire Joined: January/07/2009 Location: Benton, Pa Status: Offline Points: 4678 |
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Stop worrying guys,do these wives know that we have friends in high places..S&W.My wife's responce to that is she has friends in high places also FRY PAN & LAWYERS
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Pearls of Wisdom are Heard not Spoken
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