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Old vs. Young |
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csacpt
Optics Apprentice Joined: October/06/2010 Location: Ingram TX Status: Offline Points: 77 |
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Posted: October/28/2010 at 16:20 |
Just watching the exchange in the shout box and thought this might be relevant at the moment.
A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her faithful aged poodle named Cuddles, along for the company.
Oneday the poodle starts chasing butterflies and before long, Cuddles discovers that she's lost. Wandering about, she notices a young leopard heading rapidly in her direction with the intention of having lunch. The old poodle thinks, "Oh, oh! I'm in deep trouble now!" Noticing some bones on the ground close by, she immediately settles down to chew on the bones with her back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap, the old poodle exclaims loudly, "Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?" Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees. "Whew!", says the leopard, "That was close! That old poodle nearly had me!" Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So off he goes, but the old poodle sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard. The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here, monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine!" Now, the old poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks, "What am I going to do now?", but instead of running, the dog sits down with her back to her attackers, pretending she hasn't seen them yet, and just when they get close enough to hear, the old poodle says: "Where's that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!" Moral of this story.. Don't mess with old farts...age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! Bull**** and brilliance only come with age and experience! I like to think so anyway. |
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SVT_Tactical
MODERATOR Chief Sackscratch Joined: December/17/2009 Location: NorthCackalacky Status: Offline Points: 31233 |
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lol that was a good one. dang monkey!
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lucytuma
Optics Jedi Knight Joined: November/25/2007 Location: Wisconsin Status: Offline Points: 5389 |
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Now that I'm getting older, I have to agree.
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"The democracy will cease to exist when you take away from those who are willing to work and give to those who would not." - Thomas Jefferson
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tman1965
Optics Master Joined: July/20/2010 Location: South Georgia Status: Offline Points: 1456 |
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+1 with LT!
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Sometimes my tongue outruns my brain and I say something I haven't thought of yet!
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8shots
Optics Jedi Knight Lord Of The Flies Joined: March/14/2007 Location: South Africa Status: Offline Points: 6253 |
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Sounds like the two bulls, the young bull and the old bull, staring across the valley at a herd of cows grazing in a field. Says the young bull, lets run down the field, swim across the river and we each have ourselves a cow.
No says the old bull, lets saunter down to the bridge, walk across and we have the whole lot!!!
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SVT_Tactical
MODERATOR Chief Sackscratch Joined: December/17/2009 Location: NorthCackalacky Status: Offline Points: 31233 |
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Old Wise Rooster
A farmer goes out one day and buys a brand new stud rooster for his chicken coop. The rooster struts over to the old rooster and says, "OK, old fart, time to retire." The old rooster replies, "Come on, you can't handle ALL these chickens. Look what it's done to me. Can't you just let me have the two old hens over in the corner?" The young rooster says, "Beat it! You're washed up and I'm taking over." The old rooster says "I'll tell you what, young stud, I'll race you around the farmhouse. Whoever wins gets exclusive domain over the entire chicken coop." The young rooster laughs, "You know you don't stand a chance old man, so just to be fair, I'll give you a head start." The old rooster takes off running. About 15 seconds later the young rooster takes off after him. They round the front of the farmhouse and the young rooster has closed the gap. He's already about 5 inches behind the old rooster and gaining fast. The farmer, meanwhile, is sitting on the front porch when he sees the roosters running by, one right behind the other. He grabs his shotgun and BOOM! -- he blows the young rooster to bits. The farmer sadly shakes his head, "Damn...third gay rooster I've bought this month." |
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saitotiktmdog
Optics Apprentice Joined: June/08/2010 Location: IN Status: Offline Points: 256 |
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Thats funny because leopards dont like dogs. They often harassed our dogs that we had when I lived in Kenya as a kid. Lost a dog to one. Lost a dog to lions too.
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savage 110 viper-stolen
savage 93r17 crossfire 6-20x50 stolen NEF single shot 12ga-recovered stevens ranger 12ga double barrels-stolen Win 1400 shotgun Ultra slug hunter sightron 3-9x44-recovered |
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saitotiktmdog
Optics Apprentice Joined: June/08/2010 Location: IN Status: Offline Points: 256 |
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svt that was a good one
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savage 110 viper-stolen
savage 93r17 crossfire 6-20x50 stolen NEF single shot 12ga-recovered stevens ranger 12ga double barrels-stolen Win 1400 shotgun Ultra slug hunter sightron 3-9x44-recovered |
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Ed Connelly
Optics Retard God of no Chihuahua Joined: December/16/2007 Location: USA Status: Offline Points: 24225 |
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