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All-Girls Bar

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/01/2007 at 15:42
lucznik View Drop Down
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A blind man wanders into an all girls biker bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee.

 

After sitting there for a while, he yells to the waiter, "Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"

 

The bar immediately falls absolutely silent. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, sir, I think it is only fair -- given that you are blind -- that you should know five things:

  1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
  2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
  3. I'm a 6 foot tall, 175 lb. blonde woman with a black belt in karate.
  4. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weightlifter.
  5. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler.

Now, think about it seriously, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?"

 

The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head, and mutters, "No...Not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."

Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/01/2007 at 16:10
pyro6999 View Drop Down
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that sorta reminds me of a joke i heard not to long ago, the president and the vice president went to a very small out of the way town where they knew the media would not look for them and they could talk about the iraq war stragey, they found a small bar&grill in this small town and went to a corner both in the back and nobody was there but them, so the vice pres asks whats your big idea, he says well i was thinking we would tell the people that we were going to stay the course in iraq but have a beautiful blonde women tell america about it, the vice pres says tell them what all i remember is something about a blonde. exactly says the pres.
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/01/2007 at 16:34
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/01/2007 at 18:15
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/02/2007 at 08:02
pyro6999 View Drop Down
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there is a women and her husband had died suddenly about four years ago, her daughter kept telling her mom its time you let go and get back out in the world and the mother said i dont really know anybody, the daughter said i can fix that, she set her mom up on a blind date, and to the mothers surprise this guy was great, the dated for a month or so and then he decided the time was right and asked her if she would spend the weekend with him at his place in the catskills, she said of course, that night he stripped down to nothing and she followed like-wise except for a pair of black lacy panties, she looked at him and said my body is yours to explore tonight, except down there im wearing black cause that part of me is still morning the death of my husband, so the guy knew right away he wasnt getting any that night. the next night the same thing happens only this time the man has a black condom on, the women looks at that and says whats that for, he says if the part of you is in morning i want to show you my deepest condolences.
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/02/2007 at 10:34
Dogger View Drop Down
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You can't pay for this type of entertainment!
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/02/2007 at 23:07
Dale Clifford View Drop Down
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number 4

Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/03/2007 at 10:10
Dale Clifford View Drop Down
Optics Jedi Knight
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look at the magazine
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/05/2007 at 08:02
pyro6999 View Drop Down
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the pope decided he wanted to explore some of gods handy work in the united states, so he chose to take a trip to montana, he was in a wilderness area driving around in the pope mobile when he came to a wide spot in the road a terrible comotion broke out and the pope looked out his window in  terror, a man with long hair shorts sandals a save the wales hat and a t-shirt that said to hell with bush was being chased by a huge grizzly bear the bear caught the guy and the pope was frantic by now when all of a sudden a pickup comes racing into the area and three men jump out of the pickup, the pope noticed they were dressed like loggers and one man took his 44 mag and shot the bear  the long haired man was bleeding but was ok, the two other men took big clubs and finished the bear off and they loaded the bear in the pickup, the pope came over to the loggers and said oh you must let me bless you men for what you have done you spared this man life, and i also understand that in america republican loggers and democratic hippies dont get along and now that i have seen you in action i will tell the whole world thats a lie, and the men then threw the man into the backseat of there truck and the pope drove off, one of the loggers looked at the other two and said who was that guy? one loggers says that was the pope he has a direct link to heaven and access to all wisdom, the one logger says, he may think he has all wisdom, but he sure dont know anything about bear hunting,by the way hows the bait holding up, or do we have to go back to massachusetts and get more?
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: March/11/2008 at 16:14
cyborg View Drop Down
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Oh crap how did I miss this thread? good stuff here.....Laugh
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: March/11/2008 at 18:26
helo18 View Drop Down
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Roll%20on%20Floor%20Laughing  Those are great!  And so accurate about the bear bait.
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