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A Farmers Education

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/11/2011 at 06:27
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show me your sheep!!

Joined: January/01/2009
Location: Pennsylvania
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Why we shoot deer in the wild (A letter from someone who wants to remain anonymous, who farms, writes well and actually tried this)

       I had this idea that I could rope a deer,
put it in a stall, feed it up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it
and eat it. The first step in this adventure was getting a deer. I
figured that, since they congregate at my cattle feeder and do not seem
to have much fear of me when we are there (a bold one will sometimes come
right up and sniff at the bags of feed while I am in the back of the
truck not 4 feet away), it should not be difficult to rope one, get up to
it and toss a bag over its head (to calm it down) then hog tie it and
transport it home.

       I filled the cattle feeder then hid
down at the end with my rope. The cattle, having seen the roping thing
before, stayed well back. They were not having any of it. After about 20
minutes, my deer showed up-- 3 of them. I picked out a likely looking
one, stepped out from the end of the feeder, and threw my rope. The deer
just stood there and stared at me. I wrapped the rope around my waist and
twisted the end so I would have a good hold..

       The deer still just stood and stared
at me, but you could tell it was mildly concerned about the whole rope
situation. I took a step towards it, it took a step away. I put a little
tension on the rope .., and then received an education. The first thing
that I learned is that, while a deer may just stand there looking at you
funny while you rope it, they are spurred to action when you start
pulling on that rope.

       That deer EXPLODED. The second thing
I learned is that pound for pound, a deer is a LOT stronger than a cow or
a colt. A cow or a colt in that weight range I could fight down with a
rope and with some dignity. A deer-- no Chance. That thing ran and bucked
and twisted and pulled. There was no controlling it and certainly no
getting close to it. As it jerked me off my feet and started dragging me
across the ground, it occurred to me that having a deer on a rope was not
nearly as good an idea as I had originally imagined.. The only upside is
that they do not have as much stamina as many other animals.

       A brief 10 minutes later, it was
tired and not nearly as quick to jerk me off my feet and drag me when I
managed to get up. It took me a few minutes to realize this, since I was
mostly blinded by the blood flowing out of the big gash in my head. At
that point, I had lost my taste for corn-fed venison. I just wanted to
get that devil creature off the end of that rope.

       I figured if I just let it go with
the rope hanging around its neck, it would likely die slow and painfully
somewhere. At the time, there was no love at all between me and that
deer. At that moment, I hated the thing, and  I would venture a
guess that the feeling was mutual. Despite the gash in my head and the
several large knots where I had cleverly arrested the deer's momentum by
bracing my head against various large rocks as it dragged me across the
ground, I could still think clearly enough to recognize that there was a
small chance that I shared some tiny amount of responsibility for the
situation we were in. I didn't want the deer to have to suffer a slow death,
so I managed to get it lined back up in between my truck and the feeder -
a little trap I had set before hand...kind of like a squeeze chute. I got
it to back in there and I started moving up so I could get my rope back.

       Did you know that deer bite?

       They do! I never in a million years
would have thought that a deer would bite somebody, so I was very
surprised when ..... I reached up there to grab that rope and the deer
grabbed hold of my wrist. Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like being
bit by a horse where they just bite you and slide off to then let go. A
deer bites you and shakes its head--almost like a pit bull. They bite
HARD and it hurts.

       The proper thing to do when a deer
bites you is probably to freeze and draw back slowly. I tried screaming
and shaking instead. My method was ineffective.

       It seems like the deer was biting
and shaking for several minutes, but it was likely only several seconds.
I, being smarter than a deer (though you may be questioning that claim by
now), tricked it. While I kept it busy tearing the tendons out of my
right arm, I reached up with my left hand and pulled that rope loose.

       That was when I got my final lesson
in deer behavior for the day.

       Deer will strike at you with their
front feet. They rear right up on their back feet and strike right about
head and shoulder level, and their hooves are surprisingly sharp... I
learned a long time ago that, when an animal -like a horse --strikes at
you with their hooves and you can't get away easily, the best thing to do
is try to make a loud noise and make an aggressive move towards the
animal. This will usually cause them to back down a bit so you can
escape.

       This was not a horse. This was a
deer, so obviously, such trickery would not work. In the course of a
millisecond, I devised a different strategy. I screamed like a woman and
tried to turn and run. The reason I had always been told NOT to try to
turn and run from a horse that paws at you is that there is a good chance
that it will hit you in the back of the head. Deer may not be so
different from horses after all, besides being twice as strong and 3
times as evil, because the second I turned to run, it hit me right in the
back of the head and knocked me down.

       Now, when a deer paws at you and
knocks you down, it does not immediately leave. I suspect it does not
recognize that the danger has passed. What they do instead is paw your
back and jump up and down on you while you are laying there crying like a
little girl and covering your head.

       I finally managed to crawl under the
truck and the deer went away. So now I know why when people go deer
hunting they bring a rifle with a scope......to sort of even the odds!!

       All these events are true so help me
God... An Educated Farmer

Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/11/2011 at 06:48
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    Inbreeding will do that!   Whacko 
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/11/2011 at 06:53
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Chief Sackscratch

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Now thats funny
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/11/2011 at 10:58
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/11/2011 at 11:04
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oops!

Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/11/2011 at 12:23
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Now we know. Loco
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/11/2011 at 12:26
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bowsNbugs

Joined: March/10/2008
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WOW Learning life's lessons.
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: February/11/2011 at 13:58
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Hope he doesn't get a moose on the loose...
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