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A Bathroom Poem To Men

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 10:54
Stephanie View Drop Down
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A Bathroom Poem To Men
The grossest thing for me to see
is my bathroom floor all full of pee.
Why can't they make it in the bowl?
Don't they see there is a hole?

Out in the woods, they think it's cute
to see how far a guy can "shoot."
But in the house, it's plain to see
there is a bowl in which you pee!

(It's usually white and kinda round
you hit the water, not the ground.)
Why can't they make it in the bowl?
Is it a problem with control?

If not control, then tell me why
they make my bathroom such a sty?
Come on guys, get a clue!
You know what you have to do.

Be a human - not a pig
and don't forget to lift the lid.
When you're done, make it flush
don't always be in such a rush.

Then take the lid and push it down
(don't make us women feel like clowns)
Falling in, it is not fun
getting water on your buns.

Zip up your pants and you're all done
now wasn't that a lot of fun?
Keep this little poem in mind
Your woman will find you very kind.
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 14:39
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Winkhow come women cant lift the lid for us when they are done???? also dont you look before you sit, Ive herd of rats crawling through the pipes and making it up to the bowl:thought you might like knowBig%20Smile
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:03
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 First off ... GLAD TO SEE YOU BACK STEPH !  Second ... my wife did sit on ours one night in the dark and I had the seat up and guess what .... after the blood curdling scream I never heard such a foul mouth and the names that woman called me after she took a middle of the night shower ... I think I still have the bruises ! I think I made it worse cause all I could do was laugh .....   Jump%20and%20Spin  even when getting thumped .

Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:03
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Rats would be the least of my worries! Now SNAKES would make me think twice
before sitting!! Snake
 
When we go camping there are a few places that have the bathroom that you can look down! Which are scary! I hear one time a lady sat down to use the bathroom and there was a man hiding in one of them!!! I also look before I use one of those things!!
Down%20the%20Toilet
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:06
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 A man hiding down in the hole !!!!!!  YUCK ..... at least he'd be easy to track .... or sniff out ! I'd like to know how he squirmed down that lil hole and better yet how he got back out .... Shocked
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:09
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Originally posted by mercenary1947 mercenary1947 wrote:

 First off ... GLAD TO SEE YOU BACK STEPH !  Second ... my wife did sit on ours one night in the dark and I had the seat up and guess what .... after the blood curdling scream I never heard such a foul mouth and the names that woman called me after she took a middle of the night shower ... I think I still have the bruises ! I think I made it worse cause all I could do was laugh .....   Jump%20and%20Spin  even when getting thumped .

 
Yes!!! Been there done that!! I'm trying to teach my 3 yr old to put the seat down.
I've hit the water several times. Of course when you try to find out who did it no ones
want to step up!! lol....
Wasnt%20Me
 
 
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:18
Stephanie View Drop Down
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The holes are pretty big, well the ones that I have seen. Any one could fit down that stupid thing! I hate them. I would rather not go then to venture to use on of those.
 
 
 This can fix the whole problem!
 
 
 
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:19
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We [ SWFA ] needs to market some kind of a strap-on helmet-thing with CROSSHAIRS in it for men to use when aiming at the commode--kind of like a Norden Bombsight.... It would make going to the bathroom a FUN thing to do.....and SWFA could sell them to EVERYONE!!!....even Democrats!!!   Wink
 
(....I am always thinking.................!!) Google%20It
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:19
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 No joke some have been snake bit in them .... the old wooden outhouse types ... and bees . Snakes seem to like to lay above the door area too ... you're gonna look awful funny running out with your pants around your ankles screaming " SNAKE "
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:28
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 Steph ... the dual commode ... do they come with gas masks ? I love my wife .... BUUUUUT ...  oops wrong terminology .... plus she'd leave my side paper roller empty .
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:34
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Originally posted by mercenary1947 mercenary1947 wrote:

 Steph ... the dual commode ... do they come with gas masks ? I love my wife .... BUUUUUT ...  oops wrong terminology .... plus she'd leave my side paper roller empty .
 
Laugh LOL!!!
 
Good Point. You can do this with your kids tooooo!
 
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:40
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 That's FUNNNNY !  God love her ..... isn't she dear though ?
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:48
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OK, this would scary me more then the snakes!
 
RUUUUUUUUUUUNNNN!!!!!!!! Pants or no pants!
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:51
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Originally posted by Stephanie Stephanie wrote:

OK, this would scary me more then the snakes!
 
RUUUUUUUUUUUNNNN!!!!!!!! Pants or no pants!
Can you imagine the paper work after that job? Shocked
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:53
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Oh yeah!!!! DON'T FLUSH IT HAS YOUR EYES!!!!!! LMAORoll%20on%20Floor%20Laughing
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 15:58
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I've been broken, After being thrashed a few times by my wife and daughter for leaving the seat up I wised up, now I pee sitting down, broken but wise.

Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 16:10
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LOL! Can we say experiment gone bad!

 
Star%20Wars
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 16:13
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Mexicali food will cause this, be careful what you ingest.
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 17:51
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I have had this argument with my wife many times. When you apply logic to it, the man wins every time. First gravity works, it's easier for a woman to put the seat down (gravity and less contact with seat and lid) than it is for a man to pickup the seat and lid (working against gravity and more contact with seat). Second, look at it like a target, women sit on the bullseye with no chance of missing the X-ring, men on the other hand are not equiped with a front sight and the bore is not always aligned with the barrel and we are shooting from long rangeSharp%20Shooter. We have to operate and respond to sight and/or sound ( like shooting tracers at steel plates), in the dark if it tinkles your on, if it splatters adjust your aim er fireFlame%20Thrower. But I'm arguing with a woman and logic has no meaning (at least as it pertains to her winning the argument). Anyway we have come to a compromise, the seat and lid stay down all the time (if I gotta put it down then she's gotta pick it up or vice versa).
The guy down in the hole was renting the basement apartment.Yikes
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 18:11
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Shocked
 
Not too keep you up at night or anything,but..........Shocked
 
 
 
 
Is this what it means to "snake the drain " ????


Edited by martin3175 - May/06/2008 at 18:25
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 18:13
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Ready .....Aim....Bombs Away !!!!!
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 18:18
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NO FAIR, There's a definite tilt on the seat, and getting a dead zero from a cold bore too, and the unknown properties of the load makes the whole thing precarious at best!!!!!!!!!!!!
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 18:19
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Use Kentucky "windage"
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 18:21
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The windage seems to be about maxed out on that right side there. Perhaps a well prepared curve squirt will work.
 
We AIM to please, You AIM too PLEASE..... 
Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)     Back to Top Direct Link To This Post Posted: May/06/2008 at 18:24
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The age old argument of distance VS accuracy.....the debate continues
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